Elevators

I work on the 18th Floor. I ride the elevator a lot. Today, when my co-worker was surrounded by other riders, unnecessarily, I realized how amusing this part of the day is to me.

There are a few methods to riding an elevator:
The single rider...stand where ever you want. Just don't adjust anything, there are cameras.
The double rider...stand on either side of the cart.
The triple rider...line up on the back wall OR if you get on at different times, there may more of a triangle shape.
The Crowd...cram as many people as possible.

Tips:
Avoid eye contact.
All conversation must end upon entrance.
Always face the door...not the lovely people who are already in the elevator.
Space...it's all about space. The law of "splitting the difference" ought to be applied.
If there are people in front of you who are getting off on your floor, let them get off first.
Don't risk your life by sticking your arm out to keep the doors from closing, just wait for the next elevator.
Always make sure you are pushing the right button. It does no good to get in an elevator and push the current floor button. Just saying.
Cell phones aren't guaranteed to work while in the elevator. End the conversation before entering the lift.
If you're only going one floor, just use the stairs. It's actually faster.

Any disruption to these socially acceptable methods causes discomfort & anxiety to other riders.

I'd like to meet the lady who provides the voice for the elevators. She seems nice.